… or, my friend just ate my weekend.
I’m going to keep it short because, as I’ve just pointed out, there’s not much weekend left. What I’m wondering, is how do we go about managing our friends in a world where friendships have become so important but don’t always have the same resilience that being family (and therefore stuck with each other) can have.
And it’s not that I have a problem with my friend eating my weekend. It’s more about, what do you do when other people’s problems are beyond you? When you don’t know what advice to give, or sometimes even what to say?
I have a friend who takes on too many of her friends’ problems – she manages it by staying single and therefore able to give them her all. Not a great long term solution for her.
I have another friend who shuts herself off from other people on a day to day basis – she manages it by being absorbed by her own family. Not many of her friendships endure.
My own tactic? I hadn’t thought about until now. Until deciding that my life had to take priority, sometimes. Previously I’d manage it by taking it all on, and trying desperately (not always successfully) to keep too many balls in the air. Not something I can survive long term.
So what do you? What are you tactics? Suggestions?
Perhaps it’s time to apply a touch of that family-type honesty to our family of friends. If they can handle it, I guess you’re stuck together forever.
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Right now, I’m feeling totally strung out and overwhelmed. Deadlines whooshing past, contracts falling over, sick kids, renovations in progress (including moving office), bills making ugly piles around me.
I’m so crazy, I even sprayed Rescue Remedy on my cheeks instead of my tongue, because I was in too much of a hurry to aim straight. It’s okay though. I have really relaxed cheeks now.
So I decided to take five – but here I am, still multi-tasking (I should pay more attention to Dean Jackson’s 50-minute focus finder!). Why can’t I ever just stop multi-tasking? Why can’t I learn to sit? Hmmm, let me try that…
Uh oh. Just glanced at the sun sliding out of sight – which makes me think about washing on the line. Which reminds me I’ve got another load to hang out. Perhaps I should have a windowless office?
I leap to my feet, then pause. Plant my butt back down. I’m taking five, remember? So far, I’ve made it to 1 minute 45 seconds – and I’ve already planned my next 15 moves.
Wait. My daughter races in, terrified by the huge lump in her throat. I investigate, only to discover it’s her voice box. Emergency Response Vehicle temporarily parked.
A reminder pops up. Meeting in town to get to. When did I decide I didn’t have enough to do and should agree to join the Board of my professional association.
I’m over the rushing and the madness, so I’m going to sort my life out. Again.
Either that or buy shares in herbal calming potions.
I’ll keep you posted.
cheers and beers
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