Managing friends

… or, my friend just ate my weekend.

I’m going to keep it short because, as I’ve just pointed out, there’s not much weekend left. What I’m wondering, is how do we go about managing our friends in a world where friendships have become so important but don’t always have the same resilience that being family (and therefore stuck with each other) can have.

And it’s not that I have a problem with my friend eating my weekend. It’s more about, what do you do when other people’s problems are beyond you? When you don’t know what advice to give, or sometimes even what to say?

I have a friend who takes on too many of her friends’ problems – she manages it by staying single and therefore able to give them her all. Not a great long term solution for her.

I have another friend who shuts herself off from other people on a day to day basis – she manages it by being absorbed by her own family. Not many of her friendships endure.

My own tactic? I hadn’t thought about until now. Until deciding that my life had to take priority, sometimes. Previously I’d manage it by taking it all on, and trying desperately (not always successfully) to keep too many balls in the air. Not something I can survive long term.

So what do you? What are you tactics? Suggestions?

Perhaps it’s time to apply a touch of that family-type honesty to our family of friends. If they can handle it, I guess you’re stuck together forever.

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